John Hurst

Behold! A Nintendo! At your local mega toy store, even! Does that other store have? We say nay! Don’t even look in that trash fire they call a “shoppe”. We know they don’t have it because we of Toys R’ Us say they don’t! We made the deal with Nintendo! It’s our stock! You can’t have it! Unless you want to buy it from us? Then, okay. Maybe we can come to some sort of arrangement. We’ll meet in a secure location. Say, at our Toys R’ Us stores all across the US? Video Game Aisle? Ask for Rex at the video game counter. He’s the one with the knife wounds.

John Hurst is your host this week and he’s trying to prevent the aging process by not learning. Aaron Littleton is your co-host and he found a loop hole to get out of podcast conversations.

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Freeze, kids! Don’t you move! This is an emergency! A food emergency! We gotta get you the most non-food content your body can technically digest! Here, suck on this hose full of cheese! Then eat the fruit roll up and corn! Your body will eventually make something that resembles nutrition, but for the sake of all that is Holy, you cannot move. And you definitely cannot eat that brownie. THAT BROWNIE IS LAST FOR A REASON. Didn’t you follow the directions on the– oh god they ate the brownie. Get the penguin. Get the damn penguin! Now!

Aaron Littleton is your host this week and he is worried about when the fruit roll-up comes into play. John Hurst is your co-host and he loves the flavor of yellow Quantum Juice, full of yellow!

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The 90s were a time. Some humans experienced it and it was okay! Other humans did not and that is okay too. Just know that during that time we had a song by Rednex blaming a Cotton-Eye Joe for not being married some long time ago. The good news is that the 00’s also could experience their dismay towards Cotton-Eye Joe, as long as they were inside a fallout shelter. And singing into a light bulb. That’s all they have in the future. Let them have it. We aren’t going to experience that time and it’s okay. Captain Jack will be there to guide us towards the light, though.

John Hurst is your co-host and he is sad that Crazy Frog is Twitter dead. Aaron Littleton is your co-host and he’s getting the special High School ring made.

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OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO~~~~OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO–

Aaron Littleton is your host and he’s getting drunk off news gift chocolate liquers. John Hurst is your co-host and he’s incensed by the size of Cheez-Its(tm.)

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Hey everyone! Do you have your copy of Mortal Kombat 3 yet? How about the movie? The action figure? The animated direct-to-video show? The stage show? The cookbook? Well, come with us to E3 1995 and be Hype(tm) for Content(tm)! We have all the content! What’s the internet? We barely know about it! It might not even be that big of a deal! Buy our strategy guide instead! Find a morning star! Learn a martial art with dragons on it! Get lost at the mall with the morning star and be escorted out by security! Only then can you truly know what Mortal Kombat fever is all about!

John Hurst is your host this week and he’s ready to incite the incantation. Aaron Littleton is your co-host and he has a sandwich suggestion for you.

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Ask us questions at questions@videodeathloop.com!