Year: 2020

You get knocked down, but will you ever get back up again? It’s a question posed by Chumbawamba in the 90s and we embraced it in every commercial sense. That’s why when you have a game made by an American company detailing soccer in low polygons with a freakish latex-laden bird mascot, you need something to cover it all with a warm, comforting blanket. That blanket is Chumbawamba and as your see that weirdly detailed in every specific areas bird running down a stock footage street in France, you know everything is okay. Because you’re about to play World Cup 98 for the Playstation 1. And this intro is playing and your cousin just let you be Player 1. You’re the best at Player 1.  I know you are. You’ll get up again.

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Sometimes you just need to watch a mashup video that hastily combines two properties to celebrate an album that is all about merging media proprieties. Like this fan video of Neil Circierega’s mashup of Queen and the Spongebob Squarepants theme. And that’s fine! What are people in the future going to say about it though? Who cares about them! They don’t know anything! They probably think this is the official version of both tracks! They’re writing thesis’ on the Legend of Zelda song and saying it’s by System of a Down. They’re going to get a Mega-C on that paper and they’re going to not mind because they’re not going to need that in the future future! No, they got a Political Art degree from Cumbersome University! They got dreams! And none of these dreams are Mouth Dreams! Now, leave them alone, they got to listen to the classical station because it’s Gaga O’Clock followed by some mother-effin’ fugues.

(Also? Hey, future student? It’s by the Rabbit Joint. You’re welcome.)

Aaron Littleton is your host this week and he is declaring himself host well before all the hosting duties have been counted. John Hurst is your co-host and he’s starting a pit in this recital.

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Aaron’s hiccup on Archive.org.

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What the heck is a Rax? We don’t have one where we live, but John (may) have been to one before. It’s got speed lines to tell you it’s fast! And people apparently explode when you say the slogan for their short time pita wrap thing. Terrifyingly, at that! Can you get some Rax and take it on the lake with you? Drive a boat with one hand and a pocket wrap thing in the other? And a Miller Lite in it too? Because you’re on a boat? Does this summary have too many questions? Maybe? Maybe? Try a Rax, if it still exists where you are!

John Hurst is your host this week and he’s exploding from pita-pockety goodness.. Aaron LIttleton is your co-host and he’s failing a boat class!

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Come to Cabot Cove! Please! We need people to move in! Come see our nature and outdoors  and fresh air and trees!  We have lots of available, affordable housing for you to move into!  And we have Angela Lansbury, the star of Murder, She Wrote! Just ignore the fact that the last three people who lived in there were murdered. Or the murderer. I forget. We have so many murders happen here. You start to lose track especially while trying to remember where Angela Lansbury is at at any moment. Because you will run into her twice. Once alive and once dead. And she’ll write a book about it! It’ll be okay! Three stars on Amazon, at best! So come on down to Cabbit Cove! We’re waiting on you! To be murdered! Maybe! Please help us.

Aaron Littleton hosts this week and he’s wishing upon a gacha star! John Hurst co-hosts and he wants the number “3” on the back of his tombstone.

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It’s an emergency Halloween slumber party and the nearest place is Walgreens. They don’t have any of their 4 for $10 Coca-Cola Products or pizzas, but they do have a copy some Quaker Oats Cereal and a copy of Bedazzled starring Brendan Frasier in the $1 bin ready for watching. It’s just as good right? They’re all hopped up on sugar and socializing that they won’t care whatever happens. Just let them all nestle in their Emily the Strange pajamas and log onto Neopets because you’ve done your duty for Halloween. Good job you! Wait, wasn’t that cat a dog before?

John Hurst is your host this week and he’s trying to get The Miz to make Suburban Commando 2. Aaron Littleton is your co-host and he wants to know what’s with all the hair for sale in Walden.

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